Wednesday, April 05, 2006

This is a follow-up post. Demo, I think already knew all the stuff you said but I suppose I got Hollywooded out of my head, which is a first, as far as I can remember. Since when is featuring homosexual characters in a movie "art"? Im sure Brokeback Mountain sucked big time, but since it focused on two gay cowboys. WHAT?! I remember a South Park where the running joke was that all artsy movies were about gay cowboys, then Brokeback Mountain comes out and it seemed like a joke. What a bunch of hosers. Since Im on the subject...

I want to talk about the emasculation of the American male. Has anyone besides me noticed how the male in the face of the media has been steadily declining for 10, 20 years? it used to be that advertisements had big burly man voices announcing, and now its like these mid-ranged, wormy little boy voices. It really, really annoys me. Its the kind of voice that all the guys in Boy Scouts had because they hadnt ever grown up and were living in a kind of developmental limbo. But just look around--pink shirts? PINK shirts? Kiss my big white rump, there is NO WAY Im wearing a pink shirt, ever--I wore a purple shirt at Ram's wedding, but thats different; for one, it was her gig and I wasnt going to ruin it, and two, it was subdued with black, and it was royal purple anyway. But there is not a legitimate way of explaining pink shirts! Its like its a test to see just how far guys will go in order to get in some chicks pants.

Since its no longer popular with the ladies to be manly, I have two options. Either:
  1. Join the Castrati (a term coined by Rush Limbaugh, I think; I heard him use it at least)
  2. Die lonely surrounded by my marvelous firearms collection

Hmmmm, now that I look at my options, having 10 Calicos doesnt seem like such a bad thing....

But everyone mark my words--the next step in "Mens" fashion will be something that is utterly on the borderline of the genders. I bet you a million bucks. Itll be something so freakin girly no honest man would wear it, but the metros would. OH WAIT! Mens fashion is already there.

2 Comments:

Blogger Demosthenes said...

So you're saying if I go metro - then all my dating problems will be solved? :) Ah if only it were that easy.

2:25 PM  
Blogger frustratedwriter said...

A calico would be a sweet thing to have and probably more reliable.

9:38 PM  

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